Gossip is a shop item in the game Steamlands. It appears in almost all levels and can be bought cheaply for ₤50 (fifty pounds). Gossip is the cheapest shop item in all shops across the Steamlands world. When bought, the player will get a few sentences or a paragraph of information and tips about the level to come.

Gossip bar

The gossip shown in a shop

The shopkeepers will rarely provide useless info. The gossip the player gets depends on the shopkeeper they pay for info, as different shopkeepers will provided different types of information. Very few shops do not carry gossip. The tin man is known for not carrying gossip in most of his shops.

Character & Gossip type


The mechanic offers advice about the guns on enemy tanks, which ones to pick up, and how dangerous they are to the player.

Rich British man

The rich British man offers advice about the blocks and advantages on the player's tank. He mentions a lot of the town life in his gossip.


The salesman offers advice on weaknesses on tanks and the number of tanks the player will face.

British army pilot

The British army pilot offers advice mostly about guns, the advantages they have and their weaknesses.

Tin man

The tin man offers advice mostly about the efficiency of the enemies tanks and what weapon to use on them.

Strong man

The strong man operates only two stores throughout the Steamlands world. One piece of his advice is useless, the other is some what useful.

Rich British woman

The rich British woman gives advice on what gun to destroy on enemy tanks.


The drifter gives advice about armour. His advice ranges from the player's armour to weak spots on the enemy's armour.


Below is a full list of gossip in Steamlands.

White Trail

Gossip that appears in shops along the White Trail.

Level Shopkeeper Gossip
Gun Shop Mechanic "Well squire, first thing you'll need to do is grab some of those fancy looking blocks on the floor out there. They're called Determinators. Using those you can still shoot and leave your engineer to get back to shovelling coal"
Bargain Hunt Rich British Man "The first rascal you'll meet has very poor armour in places. Aim for the weak spot, then tool up with the junk that's lying around and go finish the second tank."
Sky's the Limit Salesman "If the front door is locked, well, then you can always go through the hole in the roof can't you. When you see the fella blocking the road ahead, I'm sure you'll catch my drift."
Yoga Flame British Army Pilot ""These Flex guns look pretty fancy, but they're just the basic version of all guns yet to come. Unlike the determinator, you can aim them at blocks that aren't level with them. But they won't aim so well once when damaged, unlike the Deteminators, which just fires slower. Use their ability to concentrate fire on a weak spot, that's the trick!"
Keeping Track Tin Man "The first tank you will fight is the hardest. Pay attention to how damaged his blocks are. Move your guns to the back and use the engineers coal to strike through the weak spot. On the next tank you will just need to take out his stack of guns from the bottom. Most inefficient design.
Man of Steel Strong Man "Man, I had such a good time dancing last night, but there was this guy that was causing trouble. I went up to him and pointed my mighty finger at him, and he left. People like that make me so angry, and thirsty."
The Escort Drifter "There are plenty of small blocks on that Tank of yours that can be arranged. To protect against the elements. And bullets. Be sure to move new armour into position to protect yourself and your passengers."
Stealing to Survive Tin Man "No Gossip"
Special Delivery Tin Man "No Gossip"
Ricochets Drifter "My uncle once fired his musket right straight into one of them shiny reflectum kettles. Poor old fool got hit by the ricochet straight in the kneecap and ended up with a second hand steam-powered peg leg. Now I hear the hostiles outside town are gathering reflectum armour... what on earth could they be up to?"
Unarmed Mechanic "Wasteland scouts recently spotted a vehicle patrolling the mud plains, apparently equipped with an experimental high-pressure cannon. I wouldn't rely on ANY armour to reflect a hit from that one."
The Mirror of Venus Mechanic "The Enemy spent a lot of time polishing the surface of there precious new weapon. The inside is a whole different story. Rumour has it that the core was made from scrap metal and booster units scavenged from run down old chassis brought in from the deep zones. Appearance seems to be a lot more important the reliability"
Target Practice Tin Man "No Gossip"
Assembly and Assimilation Rich British Man My wife is a terrible cook. Avoid her cabbage pie at all costs!"
Mr. Fix It Rich British Man "Good man that Arthur Gasket, it would be a shame to lose him on your trip when you could be aiming him at essential weapons on your tank that are under attack. Of course he'll just keep repairing any old thing, but if you aim him like a gun you'll get the best out of him."
Super Paratrooper Tin Man "Using Flash the Paratrooper is the most efficient way to complete this mission"
Hook Line and Sinker Mechanic "Keep that block chap in the top of your hat as if he were royalty. You won't stand a chance against the tank behind him without him."
Steel and Gunpowder Rich British Man "The other night a wasteland tank rammed the village wall and a chap from the crew came flying over the wall, landed on his face outside the social club and immediately started a fight with the guardsman Smith. In other words, tank pirates around these parts are really aggressive, I suggest you stay on your guard if your heading out."
The Hatchet Brothers British Army Pilot "I hear you've got the hatchet brothers on board. Peculiar fellas, probably not right in the head. Something about witnessing a horrid polar bear attack when they were just wee lads. Still, they're very effective in battle. One of them will usually strike at a carefully selected target on the enemy battle engine, while the other would distract the engineer."
Mjolnir British Army Pilot "No Gossip"
Battle Engine Blackhammer British Army Pilot "Five years ago I was I was serving on a battle blimp when we encountered blackhammer. We fought for hours, but in the end we were taken down and only a few of us managed to escape slavery. Blackhammer was built in layers. Make sure you don't open up to much of its defences at once, or you are bound to go down the same way we did."
Leave no man behind Drifter "I've spotted five battle engine up ahead. An enslaved repairman is working on board the first vehicle. The third one holds a saboteur, and the last one in the battalion a grappler man working under the whip. Leave no man behind!"
The Pirate Commander Tin Man "The armour of great war machines is stronger than any other. Its primary weapon is greater than any other. And there eye-boosters can power weapons from very far away. You must attack the eyes as fast as possible and dodge the main weapon."

Grey Trail

Below is a list of Gossip that appears in shops along the grey trail.

Level Shopkeeper Gossip
Top Down Rich British Women "Mrs. McGuillycutty's been having an affair with Mr. Wagstaff the butcher I hear. Terrible isn't it? I hear Mr. McGuillycutty doesn't suspect anything just yet but he's bound to find out soon. What a drama!!"
Grab and Run Rich British Man "Mark my words lad, you're a fool to trust the talk of waste rider riff-raff! They will most likely be waiting for you to claim the loot and then ambush you on your way back to town."
Bang on Time Rich British Woman "The first tank you'll meet is equipped with a Woodpecker machine gun. You'd better concentrate fire on that first. The next tank is easy so long as you pile a lot of armour on top of your tank. Remember to be careful with those explosives! If you drop them they'll explode!"
Like a Butterfly Strong Man Remember your foot.. ehm.. trackwork! If things start to look bleak, there's no shame in a tactical retreat.
Leftovers Tin Man "No Gossip"
The Pitter-Patter of Shells Rich British Man "What? What's that you say? Gossip? Oh yes, I had it written down here somewhere. I'm pretty sure I did, now what did I do with it? No, wait. Here it is... Nope that's my shopping list. Oh where did I put the thing?!"
Right back at you Salesman "A tank full of reflectium! What a treasure! It might seem like coal is your only weapon, but you have the enemy's bullets for your own too. Create cup shaped structures to shape bullets back at the enemy. Build leaning towers that catch thrown bullets and knock them back at the enemy. That's the trick!"
Rain and Hail Salesman "My sources claim that the area up ahead is guarded by three or four vehicles, one is very big and they all seem to concentrate their armour in the front."
Big Ben Salesman "Doesn't matter how much armour you put up front. Ol' Big Ben will still hit targets deep inside. Aim for the boosters and drive fast into them."
Punch Buggy British Army Pilot "Those Thors can destroy an engine room in two shots. But they're mighty slow. If you come up against a weapon that has a much faster reload time then you'll be in for the fight of your life. Make sure you even the playing field and take out any guns faster than Thor's Hammer early in the fight."
Descent British Army Pilot "Well armed eh? What good is a well armed tank if you don't keep it in good repair? Nothing! Concentrate your fire on their boosters and drive full speed into them, don't give them the room to aim at you without hitting their own tank. That'll teach em."
Big Jobs Drifter "Bert the local farmer is doing a really great deal on cider and pork sausages today. Yum!!"
Voyage of the Titanic Mechanic "Just drive over with all that weaponry? Nonsense! You're walking into an ambush, mark my words. But you've the largest saboteur team ever assembled on that there tank. They're the key, you just need to buy them enough time to get the job done mate."
Trading Cards Rich British Woman "I hear the first tank you'll go up against has a North Star machine gun on it. Frightful thing it is. But I also hear they haven't secured it to the tank properly. Hit the blocks it's attached to with your Hail Stone cannon and you'll knock it loose. That's the trick to defeating these tanks ahead: Steal their weapons."
Progression Drifter "The last tank of the hostile convoy has some very dangerous weapons equipped. Make sure you aim for the weak spot immediately, or you're in for a beating."
Your the best around! Mechanic "I'd like to thank you on the behalf of everyone for making New Britannia safer for all of us. You're a good person squire, and we're glad to have you around. Don't you forget it."
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